Kill Steal
by DarnedNoob
Summary: Why not to ks openly. My first real attempt at humor. The previous sucked.


Yup, I'm starting to go crappy now. Never thought I would write something like this. Note that some of the humor is so crappy you might not laugh.

P.S. If you thought the starting/middle was crappy and not worth your time, just read to the end.

* * *

Deep, deep within the Ant Tunnel, the feared Ant Tunnel, a hero is bored. Note that the hero here is not the Hero you know, but a hero in the…storyline sense. The hero that only has around a nine percent chance of being a Hero. In other words, our hero is not a sword wielder. In fact, the hero in question is an Assassin, and yes, he's bored.

"I'm bored, Joe." The Assassin said to a nearby Cleric. "What do you suggest we do?"

"I don't know, Jack." The Cleric replied. "Let's play a game of I Spy."

Jack grinned. "I like your idea. Lemme start first." He looked around. "I spy…something bouncy."

"Zombie Mushroom?" Joe answered. Upon hearing Jack's groan, he looked around him. Basically, the Ant Tunnel was quite empty. "I spy…brown."

"Zombie Mushroom?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I spy…a yellow piece of paper."

"Zombie Mushroom?"

"Man…"

"I spy…"

"Zombie Mushroom."

"I haven't finished yet!" Jack exclaimed.

"What else can it be? Look around you!"

Jack looked around him. There were only Zombie Mushrooms all around.

"True." Jack muttered. "I'm bored."

"Well, me too."

"I know!" Jack shouted. "Let's ks some n00bs!"

Joe's face lit up. "Good idea!"

_

* * *

_

1 hour, 18 minutes and 17 seconds later. (I like the number 7, if you count in seconds.)

"This isn't fun." Joe murmured. "There're too many n00bs around. I can't ks all of them."

"Noob." Jack smirked. "I'll show you."

He walked to the middle of the fabled Slime Tree.

"Hey, n00bs, look here!"

No one responded.

"Don't stare at me like that!"

"You said to look at you."

"Do you look like a n00b?"

"Oh, I thought you meant NoOne." No One replied.

Jack waved him away.

"Alright, n00bs, look here, 'coz I'm going to ks you!"

_Newbnewb has dropped your fame level._

_N00byda has dropped your fame level._

_Stewpidnewb has dropped your fame level._

_DaPwnzingn00b has dropped your fame level._

"STOP! I just said to look at me, n00bs!"

Joe laughed. "Noob. Still think you're a ks pro?"

"The n00bs here are too pro." Jack said. Jack stopped to think about what he had said.

"Wait. Cool, I just used Irony in my sentence! I'm a genius!"

"It's Oxymoron, noob." Joe replied.

_J4cKP00nZ has dropped your (JOE1337zorz) fame level._

"--ing N00B!" Joe shouted at his friend. "I'll get you!"

_

* * *

_

33 minutes, 33 seconds later.

"Okay, so I've got you. What do I do next?"

Jack smiled. Quite obviously, he wasn't planning to tell Joe that he (Joe) should be killing him (Jack) by now.

"Let's ks the n00bs here. They look n00b." Jack answered.

"Then you start." Joe smiled. "I'm going to see how you fail."

"Dammit, I used my defame up today…"

"Well, don't use it then. Especially not on me."

Jack walked into the middle of Right Around Lith Harbor, shouting, "Freeze, n00bs, because I wanna ks you guys!"

_Your fame level can no longer be decreased, forcing Nexon to have to ban your account on account of your unpopularity. Good luck quitting Maplestory and have a nice day._

Before Jack could shout, "NO!!" in denial, his avatar disappeared, along with his account.

"There. Now I can do some grinding in peace." Joe smiled as he teleported to Sleepywood.

* * *

Moral of the story: Ks if you really, desperately need to. But do it quietly.

_

* * *

_

Epilogue – One Month Later.

"Okay, I'm back and Level 25." Jack smiled.

"Oh, sure." Joe smirked back. "That's extremely long. I can get to Level 40 in that time."

"Shut up! I only play 15 hours a day! That's why I'm so weak!"

Joe rolled his eyes.

_J4CKt3hpwn3r has dropped your (JOE1337zorz) fame level._

_Joe1337zorz has dropped your (J4CKt3hpwn3r) fame level._

"Okay, now we're even." Joe grinned. "Since you'll like to prove your ability, why not a ks match?"

"Do you mean a ks match as in we ks each other?" Jack raised an eyebrow.

"No, ks match as in we see who can ks more n00bs." Joe said, trying to prevent a grin leaking out of his face.

"Count me in." Jack replied.

"Okay, we'll do it right here." Joe stomped the floor. "In the Slime Tree. You first."

"Alright then." Jack grinned widely. He walked to the middle of the Slime Tree, and guess what he shouted.

"Look here, n00bs…"

* * *

Okay, that was short. My first REAL attempt at humor. Yeah.


End file.
